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A Poem by Nisha Ramayya

by Nisha Ramayya
November 22nd, 2017

 

Before Infatuation

no matter how much you
please you inherent
inevitable going
pretend adventitious
to design or to nature
we meet at take root

intensities border
little borders between
that which does not
exist red sap
you are going to smash

much you love
saps my

where one tense ends
look up
what does

cloud covers ground
break shelter pull back

than harder thins my

another begins
not missing something
cloud rests upon
peak acted upon
how we met in please

never imagined
can grow on another
at which of these points
should we say please
again please

mutual produced in
apply me authority
an appearance of strangling
an unusual part

neon refractions
false face must hide
wishing trees would
the happiest ever
roots fall from cloud

share under cover
at many points being
take sense
grow quickly
when the ground will be
same again
reached

to rigidity by
false representation
special expression
the more or less peak

fathom this sharing
the arms embracing
our origins in
where happiness ends
our dream dwelling in
collision of cloud
like insensible in
to the earth and take root
living on off or in
divination wets

enter the medium
can beautiful settle
the false heart knows
can air

should we say happiness
root in cloud
negotiate feels like
falling impose
deflect the course of the
drop to the ground
formed accidentally
which it may or may harm

love growing downwards
more or less than conditions
beside it grows
another
best

formed by roots
missing than nothing

like me

dreamed you

can put an end to
can whereabouts
prop descending
another begins

Infatuation

mūrchana / making stupid

An unreasoning passion, an extra-
-vagant folly. ‘I can’t remember who
he was or who I was or what we did
or how.’ A military show, her arms.

Making stupid, stand in business, ‘by the
jingling of’ class stupefaction in love
as the strong one ‘their bracelets | as they bend
their graceful’ breaking off their weakest arms.

Progress swooning your mother possessed by
origins exhibit origins
administrative affect ‘a motion’
nervous ‘to embrace’ system of the arm.

Mind ‘I went away and made you distant.’
A rise or fall of enjoying sounds ‘while
our arms were busied’ a noose a sword a
severed head while we confer boons in arms.

‘The lotus stems’ ‘that built the house’ what the
fuck you talking for causing inertia
‘lotus stems’ you profit allegories
profit ‘when they become his’ contract arms.

‘They fly out of my’ making fatuous
increase of fires in India they’d let
them all burn view from insensible swoon
‘I dream of babies’ with multiple arms.

Ignorance as the strong one: ‘It’s a sort
of wedding night.’ You are very dreadful
as the horned one you look in a mirror
breaking the long bones of jingling disarm.

Good omen in women bad omen men
‘the Production of Terrorism Act’
hand in hand combat public for granted
‘stirs her will’ overseas ‘but not her arms’.

Golden state violence withered state love
‘holding her legs up’ demand and supply
stand well mother under collateral
pride of the rod curled as the hair bare arms.

‘Will of the parent’ waving from windows
winnowing baskets learned from the parents
‘hands attached & gathered’ produce neighbours
‘dead labour’ tongue your enemy your arms.

mohana / infatuating

The being deluded of assurance
infatuate national ‘must take me too’
lovers not ‘bothered to burn’ divine arms.

Lovesick of ‘the rod of the sovereign’
she sits on the rod ‘of miraculous
refusal
’ the paint peeling off her arms.

Blissful sounds mind I told you embarrassed
describe ‘a graceful gateway’ mind parting
mind melding unlikeness envy disarm.

‘Her fill’ of likeness thrown out the window
thrown into white corners her ‘skilful stroke’
confers wounds fair-weather sister in arms.

Your children are browner your making light
‘call them terrorists’ brown ‘birds mixed with men’
thrown against the wall you’re twice-born of arm.

Your children are white like your fine armour
fathoming get to fuck measures of love.
‘She stretches.’ Deferring embrace wreck arms.

We are falling from clouds we are quick to
distance embrace former bump ‘so tightly
she shall not go’ mishear boop ‘call to arms’.

The institution of their brooms ‘exposed
as violence’ feeding on enjoyment
of the earth kindness and kindness link arms.

Enjoying self as ‘smooth and cool as pearls’
you come home to smiling to downcast eyes
gestures bloodied by the love in your arms.

Poor pronunciation of the greeting
smile ‘they could not rebel’ look down ‘without
moral weapon’ sigh ‘they could not bear arms’.

mohanāstra / attacking

Attacking ‘aliquots’ passed ‘like bricks’ arms.
Against whom it is directed disarmed.
Water levels rising ‘shades of’ their arms.
Wounded pulling out of mind I said arm.
Fall on the pale of the ally cut arms.
Love in exile one to another’s arms.
Constitute alien class confuse arms.
Social can get to statecraft attack ‘armed
Neutrality’ attack many crossed arms.
Irrational in bed fleeing from arms.

rocana / making bright

Radiant arm.
‘Consciousness arm.
Of kind’ make arm.
Can get to armed.
Fuck bright bend arm.
Twitching make armed.
Exciter arm.
Brown sphere fake arms.
Embrace disarm.
Secure stars armed.

saṁdīpana / setting on fire

‘A gude’ arm.
Setting arms.
‘Cause maks’ arm.
On fire armed.
‘A strong arm’.
Failsafe arms.
Many armed.
Take brown arms.
Inflame arms.
Fall to arms.

After Infatuation

when we were                        skims and dips                        projected
deathwaters            modulating seafoam            when we were                        notknown
cast aside glance            don’t listen to poetry
look allaround                        elsewhere                        are you island too?
exclamation mark poetry                        sunrising            listen to face
armpit speaks silver drips good breeding thighs
governable     eyes   speak sandalsmoke nor quite concealed

moonlight becomes a            minimal beats bed sore
the breeze from the lily                        downtempo timely
tearstreak            the bright sky           honourably handsfree            late
ah handsome waiting for                      ah             turn slightest
becoming                   inbox                  all things for            doublehearted            her
ah magician            if you           but                        sing            standards
contradict love’s nature                        all inflections for her

when love has reached its            timetoprepare            interesting
friends’ efforts bent upon bassgrind thrive posturing
peak            pre-empt consummation            as if            without you
as if            fine            could this meeting            weakened
stomach rumbling hints                  emptybottlegreen distance shipwreckblue time
every syllable is            flushed            comes back up
giddy sick between friends and lasttrain home

the world has nought so precious shoulders
pavement offers                        restful from a portent ever
woozygolden first bus hope               barearms kneebumps firstburpspromise
forget self wakeup comes back upstairs                   again
remember being shy         drinkspill never jealous layitalloutonthefloor
ah horse cloud mountain  eking out genre
parkbench     blink sosoon into each other’s eyes

absent we set alarm clocks on fire
when near            makes me            offbeat            walkhome            redbreached
seen            steals away my self conscious            brownbird
heart            when touched            puts pins in options
threecocktails blowupparrot            the moment’s joy            warpface flirt
out my power            unpossess            decided in advance
lost when you are lost            what else

my            dust            is somewhat            dressed down you
the flowers lie reddishyellowing in her hair
scatter powder            lacquer footprints            lighted by            serpentjewel
i kiss the cathair from your eyelashes
the pomegranate seeds            from            yournomy            mixedup memory
such is the poison she has taken
greenglow longing            turquoise dawning            these new infinitives

my love rests in my mind asif
melted            restive therein                        my horses skullrattle me
whiteface reflected or painted or sculpted loversmash
set therein            asif            jewelled everagain            asif            nailed
love’s five arrows            bloodstreamers                        rosetting your heart
you are tightly sewn into seven threads
looping separation’s thoughts            love’s continuum of             everdotdotdots


Poems selected by Sophie Robinson, our virtual poet in residence for the October / November Issue of The Believer.

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